How To Make A Difference Together
Having a senior like a parent dependent on you to look after them or make all the decisions for them is quite a responsibility. So everything that relates to that person suddenly becomes a matter of needs and what you can do about them. You are constantly thinking about what needs to be done for them and how you are going to do it, it rubs off and they think of what they want too and hardly anything else. It makes for a rather unhealthy atmosphere. If we were children, these very parents would have told us we were being self-absorbed and it was high time we went out and played or did something constructive.
Doing something together with your elderly parent other than focusing on his needs and concerns is great for the both of you. For at least a little while, it helps to take the focus off them and onto something else of interest to both of you. Like children, if a senior citizen takes his mind off himself, he feels better in every way. It really is the healthier route to take if you don’t want them to go down the road to hypochondria or obsessive compulsive disorder. What they need to realize is that there’s a world out there which is bigger and more interesting than their aches, pains and problems.
It also helps a great deal if they feel needed. One of the worst things that can happen when one is old is this feeling of being useless. If they could be made to feel they are not, in whatever small way, you will see what a big improvement there could be in their health. Suddenly there is a change in perspective as well. If this could be coupled with taking them out for a bit in the fresh air, even better. Otherwise a lot of old people prefer sitting within the confines of the room simply because they have lost interest in everything.
It might not be easy at first and might take a lot of persuasion but it can be done with persistence. Initially, a sense of self-centeredness might be present and they will not see how doing something will help them. As time goes by however, things will improve, especially if you can talk to them and explain why it is important. It doesn’t really matter even if they are disabled, chances are you will still find something to do together.
For instance, you could go together and brighten up someone’s life in another assisted facility or nursing home. You could both make calls or help with mailers for the local church. Or maybe teach kids from the poorer sections of society. Anything to do with kids is usually very welcome when it comes to old people and teaching them something gives them the feeling of being needed, of having something of value to impart.
There are volunteer organizations in most cities where there are attempts made to co-ordinate a person’s ability to some kind of charitable work that can be done. Once there is some continuity in this kind of activity, you will be amazed at how enthusiastic your parent will be. Soon, the conversation will not be about aches, pains and how bad the food is but will be about what they did the last time and what they are going to do the next. Once they get bitten by the charity bug, there’s a good life ahead of them.
